Rejoice with those who rejoice...

In Romans 12, Paul exhorts the church in what the marks of a true follower of Jesus is. We read and re-read, quote and re-quote these commands, but it's different when you're put in a position where you truly have to practice them. Vs. 15 says,

Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. 

The first half of that verse, I have found, is the most difficult for me. It's easy to rejoice with those who rejoice when they experience something or are blessed with something that you yourself have never longed for. But it changes when those around you get the exact thing that you want, when they are on the receiving end of blessings you've begged the Lord for. That's when the rejoicing is hard. And that's what we, as disciples of Jesus, are called to.

In my life and in the lives of those close to me, I've seen how hard this is specifically with singleness and infertility. With each engagement, each marriage, each pregnancy announcement, each new child-- there's a deep joy, but there's also another feeling, a sting, that happens in the heart and mind of someone who has unmet desires. That's a real pain. I know because I've experienced it. And that's okay that the pain is there.

But I want to challenge us to not sit there and dwell on the things we don't have. I want to exhort all of us to stop complaining about seeing engagement announcements on facebook. I want to ask you to slow down on the sarcastic remarks and stop making fun of your friends who are "that mom" who posts every picture of their baby. I want to beg of you to not allow seeds of bitterness and envy to settle in your heart. Those seeds will sprout into full grown plants that will, in turn, drop fruits of disunity, hate, impatience, and unrealistic expectations. 

The pain is real. I know it is. I've been in 19 weddings and each wedding holds a new and different pain. But that doesn't mean I stop going to weddings or say "no thanks" if I'm asked to be in a wedding. I've had close friends struggle through infertility and miscarriages. That's a pain I don't fully understand. I know it is so difficult. But that doesn't mean we roll our eyes when our friends talk about the nausea that comes with the first trimester or throw away every baby shower invitation. 

The pain itself is not something to be ashamed of or feel guilty over. It's what I (and you) do with that pain that matters- I can either press it down, become numb and jaded, and mask any real emotion with a false sense of strength, while inflicting pain upon others because of my hurtful, selfish, and inconsiderate remarks and actions... or I can lay it at the foot of the cross and trust Jesus and His wisdom, knowledge, and love. I've done both, and I stand here today praising God for His phenomenal grace and complete forgiveness when I act a complete fool- and I praise Him for the way He has deeply and genuinely filled my heart to the brim.

I'm so challenged by Colossians 1:15-17. Listen to what Paul says,

He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn of all creation. For by Him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities- all things were created through Him and for Him. And He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.

Is this not the most beautiful thing? In HIM- our sovereign God- everything is held together. That means your story and my story- they are in His hands and we are not forgotten. That means we are free to worship Him for HIM and to praise Him for what He gives- not only to us, but to others. We are free to stand in awe at the gifts we do have, namely the redemption of our souls and the life breathed into us by God Himself. We are freed to celebrate the blessings of this life; marriages, babies, new jobs, friendships, new homes, vacations, serving opportunities, etc... Whether they come to us or to others, we celebrate.

Rejoice with those who rejoice. Trust that He is good.